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My name is Tori Martin and I play soccer and have been since I was five years old.

 

What was your injury?

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I tore my hamstring, my senior year of high school, and it happened in the very first scrimmage of the season. So I didn't get to play any games that year. It also happened a few weeks after I'd committed to come play at UTD. So that was really devastating for me. I remember going to like kick the ball, and a girl on the other team kicked the side of my leg, so there's nothing that I really could have done. And when it happened, I didn't think I tore my ACL was like, Oh, I'm going to wake up tomorrow and it's going to be fine. This is just like a contact bruise. But then I woke up in the morning and it wasn't feeling any better. We had a pair of crutches at my house. So I use those go around school. I didn't tell the college coach right away because I wasn't convinced it was torn. I just thought it was hurt. But then I got an MRI and it tore completely through my ACL ligament.

That was really, really hard. I had never had an injury like that before. So I didn't really know how to deal with it. None of my close friends or family really went through that either. So I wasn't sure you know who to talk to about it off the bat.

When I finally called the college coach He wasn't worried about it because this had happened in September of my senior year of high school. So I was going to have like, almost a full year recovery before college season would start. And that like really helps me stay positive at the beginning. It was great that I had this relationship with the college coach, and I hadn't even really, you know, got to know him that well yet. So he kind of helped me push through that at the beginning of the injury. And It was really hard because I couldn't play any of high school season. And This is my senior year says like, this is going to be the best year that I've had my career, and it's going to be really fun. And we had a really good team that year, and they actually ended up winning the state championship, which our school had not done in over 14 years. And that was I just devastating for me, because yes, I was still part of the team, I was going to practices, you know, encouraging everyone, but I wasn't on the field, and I couldn't contribute even in practice.

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Everyone was telling me, you know, you're still on the team, like, you still help them win the championship, but I didn't feel like I did anything at all. That was difficult. And then High School season came in when going back to club, it was even harder for me, because, you know, during high school season, when you're sitting off to the side, there's always people like going off track or doing something. So there's always someone to kind of talk to and engage with. But during club, It's like a random field in the middle of nowhere. And if you're not in a drill, you're just on a side to me, nothing completely bored. I had already done all my like rehab exercises. So there was really nothing for me to do at Club practice, and just sit there. And club games also kind of the same thing. I didn't contribute as much kind of coaching wise in club as I did in high school. Because in high school, you know, you have the different grade levels, and you have younger girls and older girls and club, everyone's the same age. So you kind of you've been playing with each other, so you kind of know what to do. So that was I was alright, club team was fine. Nothing really stood out about that season. And then when I was gonna be coming back from the ACL, and start like actually, walking, running, doing stuff, I had this ongoing pain in my foot for about two years. And I just decided to get it checked out because it was already out for the ACL. So when I come back, everything would be good. Turns out that I had a fracture in my foot that I've had for probably two years. And I had had x rays in the past. But it was so small that nothing showed up. And I just decided to wear an ankle brace know, as athletes do, they just deal with the pain of it's not super big. But that put me in a walking boot, once I found out that I had the fracture, and it was on the same leg as ACL injury. So that prolonged my ACL recovery by a lot because I couldn't put a lot of weight on that leg. And the doctor I saw wanted me to be off of my leg completely for my foot to heal. But that just wasn't possible because this was in May of my senior year. And I only had that summer to get ready for college season. And at that point, I knew that I probably wasn't going to get to play, I was hopeful that maybe at the end of the season, I would. But the walking boo really just hindered my ability to come back. And that doctor wanted me in the booth for about four months. And I thought that was insane. But I went along with it because she's a professional. I'm still doing a kind of ACL rehab, but not where I needed to be until the foot could heal. And then I got to school, and it's during preseason, my parents and I decided to see a professional out here. And I'm from Arizona. So Texas is a little far just to go home to see the doctor. And the first meeting, I went to with that doctor, he told me I shouldn't have been in the booth for more than a month and a half, maybe two months. So that was I didn't like that at all. Because I could have been seriously be having my ACL for a month at that point. And I hadn't done anything. So he told me that I shouldn't be using the boot and to start working on rehab for my foot first. And eventually, few months. That was fine. So I started intense ACL rehab, which took me through the season didn't get to play freshman year at all. It was difficult, but there are a few of us in that boat with ACL rehab. So kind of stuck together. And we're all kind of the same timeline. And then I got cleared to practice. I don't remember if it was in winter break or over spring break, because our spring season doesn't start till April. But I was able to practice the spring season of freshman year. And then by the summer I was fully cleared. So I came back and played sophomore year. And that was great. And I'm Junior, and it's still good for now.

I hurt it, September, senior year, up until spring of freshman year of college, so it was about I kept the track, It was about 430 days, from that year to when I just got able to practice again, fully.

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What did you have to do for rehab?

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 I don't think a lot of people understand is that you need to do rehab before you have a surgery. Because it's a ligament, It's very tricking, you need to get range of motion through your whole leg. And so that was that was painful. But also the way I kind of felt about the ACL tear was it was not got it hurt intensely was just very uncomfortable. And I could never get a comfortable position. And so that kind of went through to the rehab. And then surgery went fine. And my doctor had me walking the same day as the surgery, and the big clunky brace.

And at first post surgery, I went to a rehabilitation place that was covered by my insurance. And I stayed there for a few weeks, I'm still having checkups with the doctor and he determined that it wasn't where I needed to be. And that the rehab place that I went to was not going to be good enough to get me back into my sport. rehab for ACL is one thing. But if you're trying to rehab to get back into your sport, it needs to be just better all around, and the people need to know what they're doing. And In my case, that wasn't what was happening. So we had to find a better rehab place for my knee. And this was all before I knew about the foot. And we found some good people and they had gone through this a lot with other athletes, especially soccer players. So that was helpful. And then once we found out that my foot was going to be a problem as well, we had to kind of alter the rehab exercises so that I wasn't putting a lot of weight on my leg. I had to do like horizontal stuff, like a leg press that, you know, didn't put so much pressure on my foot. Yeah.

Um, can you explain your frustration behind? Well, first of all, like changing facilities, like Dr. opinions, and then also like a whole another injury, like I knew right off the bat that the rehab for this show is going to be hard. And it had to be important and intense enough that I could come back and play in college in that time frame because Hclg usually nine to 12 months before you can come back fully. And at that point, I had the surgery in December. So I only had until August until potentially I would be playing again. And so when I found out that the first place I went to wasn't doing adequate rehab, I was really mad. Because I took time away, potentially that I could play. And I didn't know any better. No one in my family had gone through this none of my close friends had. So I was just going with, you know where the insurance paid because it's an expensive process. And no one wants to pay thousands and thousands of dollars just for you know, rehab. But it is important. And ultimately, for the better, I had to switch and pay a little extra. But I'm fine now. So obviously that was the right decision. And with the foot, It just felt like one thing was happening after another, I thought it's going to be fun for the ACL. And the foot happens. And I was annoyed. But at the same time, I knew this was a nagging pain that I had had for a few years. And I hated ankle braces, and I was wearing them for like two years straight. So I knew this had happened. And this was the best time for it to happen. Because I didn't want to come back from the ACL in college be fine, and then have another setback with the foot. So I knew that if they happen at the same time, then I'd have a longer recovery and a better chance to come back stronger. And just, you know, be better all around and not have any other pains.

 

How would you assess your mental health? Day to day what inside of your head look like?

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 I'm a pretty positive person. So I didn't really see this as a huge setback. Obviously, it was affecting my ability to just go into college and play like every athlete wants to when they get to that point. And I had a great support system, my mom, who happens to be a nurse was there with me through every single thing, every appointment every we have exercise, You have to do a lot of exercises at home and she was there for me, I remember you have to for ACL, you have to do these things called prone hangs, where you just lay flat on your stomach and let your leg hang straight off the bed. And that was the most pain I had had through that process because you had to do that a couple of times a day. And I would lay on a bed and each time I leave this whole like puddle of tears because it just hurts so much. But My mom was with me. So she really helped that and being a nurse, She kind of knew how to deal with people in pain. And my friends didn't really understand because in high school, I had a lot of friends that weren't athletes. So they weren't really there for me, per se and the way that I probably needed them to be. But I also didn't tell them, You know what had happened and how hard it was for me. But I actually did get closer with them just because I didn't have to go to soccer as much as I had more free time. So just being able to hang out with them was good, even though they weren't like there because of the injury.

And with the foot, I was kind of all on my own with that because no one else had had that experience where they had ACL and then immediately after something else happening. So I was I was, I wouldn't say angry, but just very frustrated all the time. And definitely sometimes during that whole process, I would think do I really want to play in college? Is it really worth it? Because it's a CEO alone is so painful. And I can't believe how many people have to go through it. But The thing that helps me was that knowing that so many people went through it and they were fine. And they were playing in college even like professionals, you know, they get back into it. So just a positive outlook helps me and I don't think I got depressed. But I definitely got really sad some days and just my support system was what helped me through that.

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Would you say your relationship with your support system? 

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Definitely, I always been pretty close with my mom. Because I only have brothers, I was the only girl so we just kind of bonded over that. And this injury, We spent a lot more time together every single day. Like I said, through all of my exercises and rehab stuff and every appointment she was there for me. So just knowing like, she really cared that much, and really how much she loves you helped a lot.

Do you hesitate when you play your sport now in terms of life, are you enjoying or enjoying something?

Now I do not because it's been over three years, since it happened. But definitely at the beginning. It I was a little hesitant because with ACL there's a lot of rumors about how there's a high chance of retiring or tearing any other link. So that was always kind of in the back of my head. And I remember the first time my physical therapist told me I could start just kicking a ball against the wall, super simple. Using both legs was really scary for me, I was like really, I can use this leg that I you know that I've been rehabbing for months. And it's fine now. Because like I said, I'd never gone through this before. So I didn't know the process at all.But I trusted him. And I started doing that and it felt fine.

Now occasionally I do tweak it sometimes. And it's more of just I kind of step funny, and it hurts for like two seconds, and then it's over. And that didn't happen before the injury. So I know that's because of it. But I know that my leg is stronger, actually might be stronger than the non hurt leg, actually. So there's no hesitation now, but it definitely did take some time for me to get there. And through that, since I came back in spring season, I was able to just practice and, and not go into like hard games right away. And I think that helped.

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Now that you've overcome your injury, would you have changed anything in the process, if you could go back?

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Obviously, I wouldn't have wanted to go through this pain, but I think it made me a stronger person physically and mentally. It helps For one thing, it helps me transition into their college life better not only athletics, but in academics. Because when I came to college, I knew I wasn't going to get to play right then. So I kind of focused on the rehab and on school and I wasn't worried about like playing time or traveling and taking that time away from classes. So that kind of helped. I think I would have wished that I had talked to my close friends more about it, even though they didn't play sports just to kind of help them see where I was at. And maybe that would have made our friendship stronger. And just, you know, to be there for one another more often. But No, I would not have changed it.

It made me a better person, because I could sit on the sidelines and genuinely be happy for my teammates that were playing well and not worried about like, I want to go in. 

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 What is something positive that emerged from your experience?

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I think it's just a knowledge that I could overcome such a hard thing like that was the biggest thing for me positively.

Obviously, I would not want to go through that again.

But if it would happen, I know that I could do it. And I know that there's people there for me, People that have gone through it, My mom again, she would definitely help me out with that. And now my teammates on the college team, some of them have gone through it as well in their own time. So just knowing that I can do it, if need be. And even if it's not a Soviet something else happens, but I'm strong and I can do it.

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Top Recovery Tips

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1. You can get through it. I have. And I know a lot of people out there have. And going along with that. The second thing was find a support system, whether that's one person or group, friends, family, you know, find that support system and confide in them, really tell them what's going on in your head. Because not everyone can know just by you know, looking at you. I did have a couple people like when I would go to the story, something that saw my knee brace and like, Hey, I've been there, I went through it, it's going to be fine. So even strangers can help you there if they've been through the same injury.
 

2. Set little goals for yourself. I know at the beginning, I was thinking My goal is to get better. So I can play in college. And Yes, that's great. But when that is 12 months out, That's a little hard to you know, get the big picture right when you heard it. So set small goals, say I'm gonna walk 100 steps today, or I'm gonna work on my abs, my core and make that strong. And, you know, it helps if you just set small milestones that once you achieve, it'll be it'll be better and help you mentally instead of you know, looking for a year out.

3. Don't eat yourself into a depression.

You know, don't get yourself into a depression. I know. You know, when we're all sad, really, oh, I'm going to eat this pint of ice cream. Don't do that maybe once or twice, but It'll only make it harder if you gained a bunch of weight. You know, when you're trying to come back and just try to you know, see a little bit if you can work on your abs, you know, that's not going to affect you. Like Try like maybe a bicycle in a gym that doesn't you know, move anywhere just to try and be a little active or find some some other activity that keeps you moving. So you're not just sitting around all day.

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